Woman Woo-hoo's & Woe's

2008-10-20T07:06:00.000-07:00

I haven't blogged in a while... Things have been okay. Being extremely busy is a blessing. Apathy is all I feel lately. We leave for Vegas in two days and I don't want to go. Things aren't good with the kids and I stress leaving them. Way to much to do to even think about going on a trip. Although, I know H can't wait to get away. I wish he was going without me. I'm way to exhausted to even think about packing and getting away. I hate getting everything ready for my mother-in law to come and stay here at my house. Way overwhelming! Maybe I'll feel differently in a couple of days. My emotions are constantly on a roll coaster who knows... I may want to get away by then. I just wish it was by myself.

Killjoy

2008-09-30T06:37:00.000-07:00

What a weekend.... I'm still pissed off about it. It started out to be a great Saturday night. Hubby and I bought tickets to this cover band "The Molly Ringwaller". We decided to get dinner before we met our friends at the club. Finishing early and being an absolutely beautiful night, fresh crisp air with a hint of fall. We decided to take a walk to see the street band not far from where we were. Talking, laughing and people watching. Reminiscing about the past as we watched little children dancing in the street. It was so nice just to relax and enjoy each others company.

We got to the club early and quickly realized many of our acquaintances are in the VIP section. We socialize for a while waiting on our other friends. Of course we were invited to stay in the VIP section and received passes. However our other friends did not have them. So, we decided to float between the two areas. Being early in the night, around 9:00 PM. It was not crowned yet. Part of our group arrived. They are husband's golf pros from his golf club. After all the introductions. Husband starts to impress with buying cocktails and talking shop. As our other friends arrive about 20 minutes later, the fun begins.

I was totally and utterly insulted by my husband 5 minutes later. As you may have read... My other friends have perfect bodies and great fake breasts. My husband is obsessed with one of them. While he is introducing them to his golf pro buddies. He is whispering at the same time (I'm sure he said, this is the girl I was telling you about). Such class....

Of course my friends are dressed to the nines with low cut blouses, no bra, perfect, nipples straight ahead breasts.

I'm just standing there laughing and saying hello when out of the blue... My husband reaches over and grabs my breast with both hands and lifts them up in front of everyone. I was like... What the fuck! He just laughs and says, "What... Their my breast". I said, no their not and walked away. I grabbed my girlfriend in the VIP section to have a smoke with me. UGH!

I'm so pissed... They next day. Husband was like. What is wrong? When I told him he was like... Well, we spent $12,000 to fix them. They should look better. He was sorry and didn't mean anything by it. HA! Obviously he did... What does he think??????? I need to be his pretend trophy wife. Shoot! He better get himself one. I refuse to be that for him. I'm sure I could find my own trophy man... lol

Men are stupid!!!

M

2008-09-24T15:38:00.000-07:00

2008-09-24T15:19:00.000-07:00

Sassy Girl

2008-09-20T16:41:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was feeling oh so sassy. lol I got dressed in my favorite pair of jeans, a cute hot pink spaghetti strap tank and went to lunch with my girlfriends. Weather was perfect for patio dinning. Two martini's later, I was even sassier...Oh the small things that make me happy. What would have made it even more perfect... Would have been some eye candy to flirt with. hahahahahahaha. Yup! That's how sassy I was... :)

I crake myself up sometimes......

M

The Fountain of Youth

2008-09-17T06:51:00.000-07:00

I am 100% supportive of any cosmetic help there is out there. Having had 3 breast augmentations, lipo, laser for spider veins, laser hair removal (full monty), and botox. These procedures are somewhat painful. Although, worth every bit of pain. You know me... I feel pain is bliss. I love the results and am somewhat addicted. I'd would love a tummy tuck and another breast lift. lol

When will enough be enough? Will I ever feel content? It's so hard to compete these days. I hate getting older. I will try to defy it all the way there. Especially having a husband that loves to verbally express his roaming eyes about my younger friends. How they have nice bodies and great fake breast. Always wanting me to wear cloths that are not appropriate. To look sexy. I know he wishes I had a better body. He would go in dept to give me any surgery I wanted. He is always commenting on what a bad job the doctor did on my breast. Wants me to go in for a 4th time using a different doctor. UGH!

I know I make my husband seem like a monster. He's not! He loves me to death. It's just the comments he makes. He's been this way from the moment we met. You cannot teach an old dog new tricks. I shouldn't crucify him for that. I'm just plain tired of hearing it.

M

Disturbia

2008-09-16T14:09:00.000-07:00

I think Rihanna was thinking of me when she made this song. lol If you haven't listen to the words or better yet watch the video. It's a must do... If I can figure it out. I'll post the video to this. I'll have to ask my teenage daughter how to. HA

M

Part 2: You got to be kidding me cont...

2008-09-16T07:04:00.001-07:00

Alrighty, Where did I leave off... Feeling giddy, anticipating my husbands surprise. Sure that he will love every minute and impressed of the lengths I've taken. He calls on his way to me. He asks, Do you want me to pick up something for lunch? I was like.... What the hell are you talking about? Room Service... Duh! Get your ass over here and shut up. Can't you just show up? Mistake #1.

Shortly after the call he shows up at the door. I go to get the door ready to give him a lap dance with music in cue. But.... He make a line for the bathroom because he has to pee. Apologizing alone the way and laughing. Nothing like spoiling the moment. Couldn't he pee in the lobby??????? Mistake #2

Okay, I start over the music and sit him in a chair to dance for him. All he can do is laugh and say, have you been practicing? lol Like I can't dance. Now a little self conscience. Mistake #3.

I get the dance over with shortly after that and the sex begins. Mind you he got there @ 12:10 PM. We have until 4:00 PM to relax and enjoy. We finish up around 1:00 PM and I'm starving since I've haven't eaten yet. We start on the champagne and strawberries. I want to order room service. He looks at me with the scared look and begins to say, I'm so sorry! I can't stay. He has a meeting he cannot miss @ 2:00 PM. I was like, WHAT? Mistake #4.

You have to understand. This man golfs four times a week and is hardly in the office at all. Comes and goes as he pleases. Although, today, his birthday he plans a 2:00 meeting he cannot miss. UGH! Right! I beg him to get out of his meeting. He thinks a brief moment. He doesn't even try to call the office.

Husband looks remorseful. I feel bad for making him feel guilty. YUP guilt gets me every time. He suggests to go and get a fast lunch before his meeting. Okay where? He wants to go to "Jack in the Box" down the street because it close and fast. You heard that correct.... We got dressed and rushed to Jack for lunch. Mistake #5.

It's 1:40 PM and he's off to his meeting leaving me in the Jack parking lot. Apologizing and says, He will see me at home. I said, We have the room until tomorrow. Why don't we come back tonight after dinner? He said, sure and is gone. I go back to the hotel feeling so sad. I drown myself in the champagne, listening to sad music and cry.

What was the point of all this trouble? I question myself? Why didn't I call his secretary and make sure his calendar was clear? I'll make sure I don't make this mistake again. Then I thought. There will never be a next time. Never again!

Two hours later I return home. After dinner with the family at husband's favorite restaurant. We return home all to tired to even think about going back to the hotel.

The next day. I return to check out and gather my things. Done. Pretend this didn't happen. I feel like a fool and very embarrassed to even talk about it to my girlfriend.

So there you have it. Memorable!

M

You've got to be kidding me!!!!

2008-09-15T18:57:00.000-07:00

Oh boy oh boy! Do I have a story to share... It's my husband's birthday. What do you get a man that has everything and wants nothing. Hmmmmmmmm I know! I'm gonna give him me... We had a shaky summer, an emotional one for me. So, I decide to do something I've never done in 17 years of marriage. Something to spice up our relationship.

A week of preparation... Shopped for the sexiest lingerie my body can handle. Bought some beautiful hooker heals from the "highest heal collections" at the Gentle Men's Club after my lap dance (that's another story). Stopped at the local sex shop to get some oils and things. Heeheehee Reserved a suite at the Embassy Suite's. Picked out some sexy music on Itunes, "Prince's Erotic City and Nikki". Made arrangements for the kids after school pick up. Good to go...

The morning of my husband's birthday, I asked him if I may take him for a birthday lunch. He said, yes and would call me after his morning meeting. Kids are all off to school, husband off to work and I was off to put the finishing touches on my memorable event. Packed my suitcase with all my finding, champagne, champagne glass, diet Pepsi, and water. Jumped in the truck and drove to the Godiva store. Picked up 4large Godiva chocolate covered strawberries (frappen $26.00) and then was on my way to the hotel. Checked in and the fun began...

I wanted everything to be perfect. I set the room up with my computer to play music. Put the champagne and diet Pepsi in the ice bucket on the sitting room table with the strawberries. Laid out the oil and things on the bed. Carefully dressed in my lingerie and hooker heals, I took a photo of my body from the shoulders to my thighs and sent it via email to my husband's phone. With the subject box saying, Happy Birthday Baby. Upon opening the email it read, Embassy Suite's Rm 310, Jessica (Husband's favorite name). Fun Right!!!!!!!! I was so excited when he responded, "Be right there". I could hardly wait for him to get there.

It doesn't get any better than that. You would think... Yep, it goes down hill from then on in... UGH~!

To be continued..... I need to go to bed. I'm falling asleep... I don't want to mess up on any details. You'll have to wait till tomorrow. Night Night!

M

Dancing

2008-09-15T18:46:00.000-07:00

I love to dance... Why do women go out dancing and it is interrupted that we want to screw around? It's unfortunate that there are not many options to go dancing, without subjecting myself to groping men at a club. I must admit I am flattered at the attention. Although, I do not like the perception... Dancing is such an emotional release for me. I offend wonder why I need to dance. What am I trying to express? If anyone has an answer to my dancing emergence? Please share...

A Moment of Bliss

2008-09-15T06:44:00.000-07:00

Already, mission accomplish almost... We did not go to the baseball game. With an overheard conversation with my girlfriend and a small argument, my husband canceled our plans to attend. We decide to take our children bowling. A long overdue family outing. Of course we took two cars so my daughter could drive the little ones home, therefor we could meet up with the crowd after the game. Small compromise... Right?

It was an event when we arrived at a dance club. Everyone was two sheets to the wind and we were perfectly sober. Which no one noticed. Amongst the perfect gals that were there... Another crowd of people from our town was there as well, that I would rather not hang with in any situation. These women are the kind of women that look down at you for looking somewhat attractive due to their lack of self confidence and deep down inside wish they could look that good. Jealousy... They are the gossiper of the town making total fools of themselves. Sweet symphony for me... After a few dirty dancing songs and 2 cocktail. The night was over. Everyone was heading out the door due to being over served. Not so bad of a night. Still a little pissed off at husband....

Then my insanity began... The next day. I got an urge to have my tramp stamp enlarged. Yup! You heard that correct. I sat for two hours getting tattooed by my sister's fiancee. He fixed the once so small butterfly on the crack of my ass to this amazing piece of art. As I was in total pain (remembering the pain of childbirth) it was very soothing in an insane kind of way. With every piercing of the tiny needles pricking my skin, the numbness of my feeling deceased. Pain is bliss. I was empowered. Nothing else mattered. My pain was soothing. By the end of the ordeal the pain was barely bearable. Wishing for it to end. I can concord anything! For the brief moment life was real.

M

Rejection

2008-08-31T08:49:00.000-07:00

Have you ever done anything that made you feel rejected? Growing old is a big rejection in today's society. At least I feel that way... Rejected by your kids, husband, and stereotypical people. Do we do this to ourselves? Are we the reason there is a stereotype for women our age? Like "Cougar, M.I.L.F, Tramp, wannabe..."

This weekend was a perfect example of what I'm saying. Needing to get out and tie one on with the girls at Happy Hour. I got all dressed up, thinking I looked pretty cute. I haven't been feeling really good about myself during the week so, I was trying really hard to make an effort to be social and to look good.

My husband called while I was on my way to meet my friends and he was wanting to meet with us to say, Hi. No biggie, why not??? We all met and sat for a drink. Hubby talks sports most of the time, making me anxious for him to leave. Then he processed to talk about the wild party we had the weekend before. UGH! Which we end up bickering about. One women was is a position that he created which did not look good to the houseful of kids that were inside and watching. You see... He is the biggest flirt on this plant. Especially when it comes to thin, boob job women. Two women of this description were at my house that weekend and he was in his element. Anyway we were invited to go to a baseball game with these people (as couples). I did not want to go. Imagine that... Plus, I absolutely hate sports and would rather stay home with the kids than sit at a sport related deal. Now, if the kids were invited, that would be a different story. I would want to go because they would have fun going to a game with all their friends.

Husband finally leaves to take our children to the High School football game. I can finally relax. Thank God! A moment with my girlfriends.... After an hour, I step out of the restaurant and talk to my Husband on the cell. He processed to tell me that my friends will be calling me to beg me to go the the baseball game. Saying, It will be fun... I'm furious because all my husband wants to do is see these girls drunk and get his cheep thrills. Not hearing that I would rather spend time with the family. Of course, I give in. Frustrated, I yell, I don't want to talk to anyone and do what he wants and hang up. I'm devastated! I start to cry and I don't cry. Rejection #1.

I go back in and drown my frustrations in another drink and talk to my friends about what just happened. We end up staying till around 9:30ish. Had a great time chatting and flirting with the bartender that knows us well.

When I get home my teenage daughter (16) and two of her friends are drowning their sorrows in a tub of ice cream. They are depressed that they don't have boyfriends. I join in by diving into the ice cream as well. Trying to give them advice. My lovely, teenage daughter is horrified and say, I need to be turned into "What not to wear and say" show. I need to act my age... :( Rejection #2.

My husband and other children shortly return home. He lets me know that the baseball deal is all planned. We are picking everyone up @ 5:00PM. We will also go out after the game. Double UGH! Then he tells me a play by play of his night. Especially, how much makeup so and so had on. I replied, you never noticed that before because your eyes are never on her face. lol lol HAHAHA... I got a big kick out of that response from myself. He didn't even notice or flinch an eye on that comment. So, I went to bed. Rejection #3

Today's the day... Am I going to the game to feel more rejection???? Will he make me feel like shit if I don't want to go? Yes and Yes.... I already feel rejection #4 coming in just a measly 3 days. Stay tuned... I'm sure I'll have much to say about tonight.

What would you do????????????????????? I'm grasping at straws here...

M

Submission

2008-08-14T10:17:00.000-07:00

Hmmmmmmmm Last night we had company and my husband was telling our company that I was going through a mid-life crisis... UGH! Like the world needs to hear that! I was just saying I would like to move to Greece or somewhere by an ocean, anywhere but here in the living hell I'm in now. We bickered in front of our company for a bit and to my surprise, they agreed with me that there could be a simpler life. My husband finally agreed that he would move to Hawaii and no where else. I said, I'd compromise... lol He admitted to everyone that he was very happy with his life exactly how it is now. He wouldn't change a thing.

If this is truly a mid-life crisis I'm in... When will it pass? If it does pass will I change my way of thinking or will I just submitt to the things that cannot or will not change? Will this submission make me happy?

M

Bar Fly's

2008-06-30T12:48:00.000-07:00

Interesting Saturday night out with the husband. After a wonderful dinner we decided to stop at a this new bar and to check out the scene. We sat down, ordered a drink and my husband left to use the restroom. Moments after he left this guy approaches me and asks if I'm here with anyone. Naturally, I said, "yes, I'm with my husband." He still proceeded to talk to me. Shortly after our brief conversation my husband returns and I introduce him to this man. They both take a seat and we talk about each other. This guy gave his life story. He was 46, newly divorced and hated his ex.

My husband and I decided to play darts. Guess who followed to play darts with us. This leach of a man... He was all roamy with his eye on me and giving my husband lots of compliments about me. This guy kept asking where all the available women were? HMMMM where are all the available women that just want to get used and abused for the night... AH! He was surely out looking to get laid, a one night stand.

He was a very good looking guy and I'm sure he wouldn't have any problem to get what he wants. What bothered me the most is that mentality. Why do men behave that way? Is it a chemical reaction of no sex for a while or do most men not have a clue on what women really want. Shoot if it was just for sex... most women can get that anytime. Although, women would be perceived as loose, a ho, slut, bad girl, if we behaved like that. Men just don't get that kind of image. Which is not fair by the way! Does anyone know why men behave the way they do? I'm all ears. I'd love to know what makes men tick...

M

2008-06-24T09:26:00.000-07:00

Today, I'm feeling uncertain of my feelings... I have lots to do with kids going in every directions. I'm board to death with absolutely no motivation. Even though I'm surrounded by family and friends. I feel so alone.

I should go workout and try to lose those 15 lbs I've gained in the last year. Better yet the endless list of projects needed to be done around the house. Yet, who cares if I accomplish any of these tasks I may or may not do?

My family is so self absorbed it's ridiculous! They wouldn't care or notice...
shoot, I can feel the self pity and melancholy emotions rise as I write this.

Does it really matter????????
M

2008-01-17T21:40:00.000-08:00

I wish someone would have warned me before I entered the real world, exactly how hard it is to be a woman...